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#13068 - 11/13/06 02:14 PM Looking for your opinion
jrmiss86 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/07/05
Posts: 378
Loc: Marlton, NJ, USA
This is sooo off topic, but I am not sure where else to get good unbiased advice. I know it sounds like such a trival concern but I am at a loss of how to handle things.

I am now 20 weeks pregnant with my second child. Our first, as you probably know is a boy, Alex will be just over two when this baby is born. I have not been expecting a shower at all for this baby. I just found out that my MIL just bought a ton of presents for any future showers. When my husband told her not to get so much stuff she was outraged that we would not be having a baby shower. (we have had problems with her buying too much stuff before, it is a whole long story that I am not going to go into)Now I am worried that she is going to want to throw a shower. I personally think it is not appropriate for me to have a second shower in two years. They only things I need are clothes and things to decorate the nusery, all of which I would like to pick out myself.

Am I being totally out of line and just reacting to the fact that my MIL drives me nuts with her materialism. I really do not want people to feel that they have to give me more presents that I do not want or need.
It is so confusing. I almost think it would be easier if I was having another boy, then I really wouldn't need anything.

thanks

p.s.

Alex is doing well. It has been pretty warm and humid here. unseasonally warm in fact so his skin is doing great. I am dreading the day when the cold weather really sets in. And he is finally starting to accept the fact that he is going to be a big brother.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Heather
_________________________
Heather
Mom to:
Alex (xli and Kallmans - 2/3/05)
Liz (3/16/07)

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#13069 - 11/13/06 02:53 PM Re: Looking for your opinion
Angel24755 Offline

Member

Registered: 05/13/05
Posts: 633
Loc: PA
I don't think you are wrong at all. I honestly think it's a bit tacky to have more than one baby shower unless your kids are REALLY far apart in age. (No offense to anyone here if you have had more than one baby shower.) My mom had a baby shower for me when I was pregnant with Grey. Cade was born when Grey was 21 months old. Leah was born when Cade was a week shy of two years old. I never had another shower and wouldn't have accepted another. One was enough...I got some baby basics that I used with all three of my kids. Part of having kids is the expenses...clothes, diapers, formula (in some cases), and a ton of other things LOL. If your MIL wants to buy things for the baby then let her. You can't control what other people buy. You can put your foot down about a second shower if you're not comfortable with it though. Good luck...aren't mother in laws so much fun (NOT)! LOL!
Lisa
_________________________

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#13070 - 11/13/06 06:41 PM Re: Looking for your opinion
threerxli Offline
Member

Registered: 01/14/03
Posts: 515
Loc: virginia
I absolutely did not want a baby shower with my second. I was stressed as it was dealing with the xli thing at the time. Plus, we still had outfits in the closet our first born never wore yet, and the crib was barely even cold from the first getting into the Big Boy bed. After I thought I had expressed my view to all, and being far from home in the military I thought it was done with. Then my husband insisted one night that I HAD to go to dinner. (it was not a good night, I wanted to just go to bed) so he drags me to a chinese restraunt and several military families had thrown a Surprise baby shower for me. It was really hard to be happy. The good thing was that I received lotion, and baby food and diaper type things, so it was not a complete loss. I completely understand how you feel, just tell them that if they would like to purchase something for the baby to bring it after the birth, that you will have a home coming a few months after the birth to celebrate. (well, maybe not lol)

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#13071 - 11/13/06 07:38 PM Re: Looking for your opinion
jrmiss86 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/07/05
Posts: 378
Loc: Marlton, NJ, USA
Thanks for the responses.

I have told my husband to squash any ideas that somebody might get(i.e. my MIL) I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't being completly out of line.

Thanks again

Heather
_________________________
Heather
Mom to:
Alex (xli and Kallmans - 2/3/05)
Liz (3/16/07)

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